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Thread: Bandmates

  1. #1
    Still a Junior Member Albrecht Smuten's Avatar
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    Bandmates

    I've been so lucky (or unlucky, depends on the view) that my bandmates are also my best friends. It wasn't always so. How are your relationships with your bandmates? I want stories!
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  2. #2
    Senior Member garrett's Avatar
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    It is both lucky and unlucky sometimes. I've been friends with many bandmates I've had. It's great when you can bond on a personal level; I think it helps you come together closer as a band. Get into each other's heads and get the idea of where they're going musically. My current bandmates and I like to catch up to see concerts or for dinner or parties.

    The downside is it's like mixing business with pleasure. I've had a couple of friendships fall apart with the band. When a band splits it's like ending a marriage and can bring out the ugly side of people.
    --Garrett--

  3. #3
    Still a Junior Member Albrecht Smuten's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by garrett View Post
    I've had a couple of friendships fall apart with the band. When a band splits it's like ending a marriage and can bring out the ugly side of people.
    It works both ways - friendship ends and band splits in consequence (one example for all - you have a girlfriend in band and you brake up, voila... )

    I can imagine that professional band atmosphere is much different from a band that's mostly for fun. It's more of a coworker relationship, right?

    So, professionals, how do you get along with your coworkers?
    Love for all human beings is like listening to any kind of music. You just don't care.
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  4. #4
    Opaque John Beef's Avatar
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    I've been in a lot of bands and am friendly with pretty much everyone I used to play with.

    There are a few though, I'm thinking specifically about a drummer who was a great guy, but then he met this hippie chick - they are married now. It was a tough transition, going from normal guy to guy who refuses to use hand lotion even though his hands are so dry they're cracked and bleeding because the lotion contains "petrolates", the guy who almost cancels a tour three months in the making because his back is "sore" from a car accident a week before, but hasn't taken a single aspirin/advil/etc because he thinks the pills are poison. That didn't end well. Great drummer though.
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  5. #5
    Senior Member sergiodeblanc's Avatar
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    Not always. There have been many times where I was just a hired gun and I didn't know a single member of the groups. Being friendly is quite different than being friends, and I have had quite a few moments where the van/bus/plane couldn't get me home fast enough!

  6. #6
    Still a Junior Member Albrecht Smuten's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by John Beef View Post
    There are a few though, I'm thinking specifically about a drummer who was a great guy, but then he met this hippie chick - they are married now. It was a tough transition, going from normal guy to guy who refuses to use hand lotion even though his hands are so dry they're cracked and bleeding because the lotion contains "petrolates", the guy who almost cancels a tour three months in the making because his back is "sore" from a car accident a week before, but hasn't taken a single aspirin/advil/etc because he thinks the pills are poison.
    Oh my god, poor guy! My ex-wife used to be like that. There's only a little exaggeration when I say it almost killed me.
    Love for all human beings is like listening to any kind of music. You just don't care.
    The 3-Mike-7 devotee.

  7. #7
    Senior Member gush's Avatar
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    I have been in bands all my life. Most of my bands would only last for two or three years for the usual reasons, egos,girlfiends,egos,laziness,egos. My current band has lasted 10 years and im happy about that. We get along very well and have replaced our drummer twice and bassist twice which leaves myself and the singer the only original members. Its the only egoless band ive been in, just love it. HOWEVER, I was in a full time band back in the day. OMG! It will be the basis of my book that I write when I retire. I joined and then we spent six months putting together a show. Four of us played then there was a sound tech and a light tech, six total. When we took off traveling we quickly got on each others nerves, really bad. Light tech wouldnt shower unless I rode his butt, sound tech HATED bassist and his guitarist/brother because they "college boys". Drummer was addicted to prescript drugs, used ongoing hemorrhoid problem to convince ER Drs. to give them to him. e and the two brothers spent our time drinking and chasing tail! The other guitarist hooked up with a stripper while we were in alaska, she followed him to washington state. When we decided to head home for a break we left him in Oregon with her. Wasnt too long after that we disbanded. I still talk to most of those guys because we kinda became brothers through all that. It will be an awesome book!

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