I knew I was in for it. I'd bought Tony McManus' new album Mysterious Boundaries, classical stuff played on his PRS acoustic, and had been listening to it for several days. I took a breath and opened my guitar case. The Blonde guitar immediately started giving me a hard time.
"You haven't played me in days. Don't you love me any more?"
"Yes, of course I still love you. I've just been busy." I didn't want to tell her that listening to McManus play made me want to crawl into a cave and never play guitar again.
"He's so much better than you are, you know," referring to McManus. I played dumb.
"You know exactly who I'm talking about. Well I'm going to tell you something, Mr. L. My top was supposed to go to McManus, and instead you wound up with it. You'd better start practicing me again if you know what's good for you."
"I'll bet I'm better than he is on piano," I replied.
"Wouldn't count on it," she said.
"Would you rather be his than mine?" I asked, rather dolefully.
"Ever hear of the Fifth Amendment?"
"I'm taking it. But life being what it is, I came to your studio instead of his. So get busy! Find me some Bach!"
And with that, I went and dug up my old Well Tempered Clavier sheet music. She's going to be really sorry that she made that demand...