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Thread: Ask Lesteban -- Advice For The Toneseeker

  1. #1

    Ask Lesteban -- Advice For The Toneseeker

    Here's my first question of the day:

    "Hey Lesteban, lots of snow; beauty day for hockey, eh? I've always wondered, do the strap buttons on a guitar affect the tone? By the way, I'm a huge fan!"

    -- Puckmeister, Sault Ste. Marie, Michigan's Upper Peninsula

    Lesteban:

    Thanks Puckmeister, it's great to have fans like you. To find the answer to your question, Lesteban conducted a scientific test.

    First Lesteban played his PRS Artist V with the strap buttons on. Then Lesteban took the strap buttons off, and immediately wondered, "Hmmm, how will Lesteban hold the guitar up while standing and playing?"

    Fortunately, Lesteban knew that Science always has the answer to a question involving tone! One has only to think about the experiment really, really hard, the outline of an experiment will pop into one's head. So that's what Lesteban did. Lesteban conducted a thought experiment just like Einstein. After several days of pondering how to keep a guitar on without a strap, the solution came like a bolt from the blue:

    Studio Lesteban has an ample supply of duct tape.

    Eureka!

    Lesteban found that the guitar would stay put without a strap if he taped the entire body of the guitar to his skin with many layers of duct tape. Using this highly scientific method, Lesteban found that the sound of the guitar changed noticeably!

    So yes, Puckmeister, the strap buttons do affect the guitar's tone!

    Lesteban also paid a price for this little scientific inquiry when removal of the duct tape also removed his body hair and several layers of epidermis. But knowledge and science are worth a little personal sacrifice, isn't that right?

    Lesteban is waiting to answer your very next question! What's on your mind....about TONE?
    I saw ten thousand talkers whose tongues were all broken...

    Website: http://www.elfxi.com

  2. #2
    A♥ hoards guitars ♥A rugerpc's Avatar
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    "What, pray tell, is the best way to tone my tummy?" He asked, tossing Lesteban a decided softball...
    Thbbbt...
    Gork what your need to gork.
    Lexicon

  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by rugerpc View Post
    "What, pray tell, is the best way to tone my tummy?" He asked, tossing Lesteban a decided softball...
    Ruger, Lesteban thanks you for your question!

    For you younger players who want to get more tones from your tummies, Lesteban recommends a diet of beans.

    But there can be too much of a good thing.

    Lesteban has discovered that as he has aged, his tummy has become more prone to emitting random and uncontrollable tones. And it has been mentioned to Lesteban that these tones are sometimes accompanied by unpleasant odors.

    For this reason, Lesteban consulted Eric Clapton, who recommends the musical treatment, Beano.

    Of course, pet lovers can simply blame the dog. This is why dogs are often called, "Man's Best Friend."
    Last edited by LSchefman; 03-29-2014 at 05:06 PM.
    I saw ten thousand talkers whose tongues were all broken...

    Website: http://www.elfxi.com

  4. #4
    Senior Member
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    Hey Lesteban,
    What brand of batteries produce the best tone when I'm using a Chinese copy of a Korean clone of a 1970 EH Electric Mistress stomp box?

  5. #5
    Plank Spanker justmund's Avatar
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    "Dear Lesteban, I am looking to purchase my first wah-wah pedal however I am concerned I will not be able to make the right wah-faces in order for it to sound good. Do you have any tips or exercises for a budding wah-facist? (not to be confused with a wah-fascist hahaha!) Thank you!"

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by NomadMike View Post
    Hey Lesteban,
    What brand of batteries produce the best tone when I'm using a Chinese copy of a Korean clone of a 1970 EH Electric Mistress stomp box?
    Lesteban knows this is a trick question. The Electric Mistress wasn't invented until 1976.
    I saw ten thousand talkers whose tongues were all broken...

    Website: http://www.elfxi.com

  7. #7
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    Crap! Do you mean I bought a fake?

    Well at least it's not a problem with the Saul Reed Smith Juan Santana IV I got a great deal on from that luthier in China.
    Last edited by NomadMike; 03-29-2014 at 07:05 PM.

  8. #8
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    Dear Lesteban,

    I've always preferred my guitars in close to natural colors, sunburst about as far as I can accept. My wife and even her brother's wife's sister (and her daughter) think blue guitars sound best, and while listening to a bunch of youtubes I'm starting to think they may be right. Should I sell all of my guitars and replace them with only blue ones?

    Help, desperate!

  9. #9
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    The one thing I hate about blue guitars is that the fifth is always flat.

  10. #10
    Member dsenoj's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by NomadMike View Post
    The one thing I hate about blue guitars is that the fifth is always flat.
    I have to remember this one. It was definitely an LOL moment.
    Last edited by dsenoj; 03-29-2014 at 08:07 PM. Reason: typo

  11. #11
    Name Manglin' Putz alantig's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AaeCee View Post
    Dear Lesteban,

    I've always preferred my guitars in close to natural colors, sunburst about as far as I can accept. My wife and even her brother's wife's sister (and her daughter) think blue guitars sound best, and while listening to a bunch of youtubes I'm starting to think they may be right. Should I sell all of my guitars and replace them with only blue ones?

    Help, desperate!
    I'm sorry, Mr. Lesteban has requested that all blue guitar questions be directed to his second cousin's first wife's daughter's neighbor's uncle's only child's brother, Sergioban.

    Mr. Lesteban will not return to this thread until someone puts their foot in a bucket and sings the second verse of a Creedence Clearwater Revival song of their choice.
    Alan

    "I watched approximately 45 seconds of 'Rock Of Ages'. It was like getting punched in the soul." - Abby Krizner

  12. #12
    Quote Originally Posted by justmund View Post
    "Dear Lesteban, I am looking to purchase my first wah-wah pedal however I am concerned I will not be able to make the right wah-faces in order for it to sound good. Do you have any tips or exercises for a budding wah-facist? (not to be confused with a wah-fascist hahaha!) Thank you!"
    Yes!

    I recommend watching this video featuring the Master of Wah Faces, Robin Trower:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wzcteihsckw
    I saw ten thousand talkers whose tongues were all broken...

    Website: http://www.elfxi.com

  13. #13
    Quote Originally Posted by AaeCee View Post
    Dear Lesteban,

    I've always preferred my guitars in close to natural colors, sunburst about as far as I can accept. My wife and even her brother's wife's sister (and her daughter) think blue guitars sound best, and while listening to a bunch of youtubes I'm starting to think they may be right. Should I sell all of my guitars and replace them with only blue ones?

    Help, desperate!
    AaeCee, Lesteban agrees that blue is best left to jeans and University of Michigan jerseys.

    After all, did Hendrix play a blue guitar? Lesteban has no idea!
    I saw ten thousand talkers whose tongues were all broken...

    Website: http://www.elfxi.com

  14. #14
    Quote Originally Posted by alantig View Post
    Mr. Lesteban will not return to this thread until someone puts their foot in a bucket and sings the second verse of a Creedence Clearwater Revival song of their choice.
    Shows what he knows, huh?
    I saw ten thousand talkers whose tongues were all broken...

    Website: http://www.elfxi.com

  15. #15
    Quote Originally Posted by NomadMike View Post
    Crap! Do you mean I bought a fake?

    Well at least it's not a problem with the Saul Reed Smith Juan Santana IV I got a great deal on from that luthier in China.
    What a coincidence! I got my Lesteban signature Saul Reed Smith from the same guy!
    I saw ten thousand talkers whose tongues were all broken...

    Website: http://www.elfxi.com

  16. #16
    Senior Member sergiodeblanc's Avatar
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    Dear Lesteban,
    I have really become more advanced at the technique of not looking at my fretboard while playing, but I'm having trouble locking eyes with an audience member during a more difficult musical passage to really emphasize my incredible virtuoso abilities and smiling... Do you have any recommendations on how to keep my lips from sticking to my teeth?

  17. #17
    Quote Originally Posted by sergiodeblanc View Post
    Dear Lesteban,
    I have really become more advanced at the technique of not looking at my fretboard while playing, but I'm having trouble locking eyes with an audience member during a more difficult musical passage to really emphasize my incredible virtuoso abilities and smiling...
    This is why Lesteban wears a wide-brimmed hat and sunglasses at all times. No one knows if one is eye-locked, or not.

    Quote Originally Posted by sergiodeblanc View Post
    Do you have any recommendations on how to keep my lips from sticking to my teeth?
    This is a brilliant question! Lesteban was told by the members of a certain band to eat a peach.
    I saw ten thousand talkers whose tongues were all broken...

    Website: http://www.elfxi.com

  18. #18
    Junior Member Felix's Avatar
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    ^ I have heard Vaseline is good for that... on the whole I'd prefer to try a peach.

  19. #19
    Name Manglin' Putz alantig's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LSchefman View Post
    Shows what he knows, huh?
    You don't know that someone didn't do just that - I didn't say they had to sing it to you!
    Alan

    "I watched approximately 45 seconds of 'Rock Of Ages'. It was like getting punched in the soul." - Abby Krizner

  20. #20
    Quote Originally Posted by alantig View Post
    You don't know that someone didn't do just that - I didn't say they had to sing it to you!
    True enough. But I do know (being the actual Lesteban personage) that I didn't make any requests regarding blue guitars, Creedence or buckets.

    So there's that.
    I saw ten thousand talkers whose tongues were all broken...

    Website: http://www.elfxi.com

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