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Thread: Suicide

  1. #1
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    Suicide

    I'm 38 have mental illness and have a daughter who just turned 17 a couple days ago. I left her mom years ago and we both moved on. My daughter got pregnant at 16 and had a baby girl. I supported her and yet she don't talk to me anymore and we used to be close. I don't see my granddaughter. I don't know what to do

  2. #2
    Senior Member sergiodeblanc's Avatar
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    Whoa Buddy!

    Where's the suicide title comin' from? Are you contemplating it? While I support any human being having the right to decide what to do with their own life, I have to say tomorrow can be a better day if you work towards it.

    Do you have a doctor? Are you on medication? If you're upset about not being able to see your granddaughter right now for whatever reason, please stick around long enough to give her the chance to get to know you.

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    Prs2Studio, are you a veteran? If so contact these folks ASAP.

    http://veteranscrisisline.net/?gclid...FTJp7AodvhQAsA

    if not contact these people
    http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
    Last edited by NomadMike; 06-30-2014 at 04:38 PM.

  4. #4
    My name be scrambled ElrytNamrogo's Avatar
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    Things sound pretty ruff right now for you. I might not be able to directly relate, but will say this: You're still young and there is always time for things to turn around. If you are thinking things can't get better, please do reach out to somebody who can help. You never know what can come from taking that one step. I agree with Sergio....I'm sure your granddaughter will want to meet you and get to know you, even if it is a little further down the road.

    Best wishes, buddy.
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  5. #5
    Senior Member sergiodeblanc's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ElrytNamrogo View Post
    ...I'm sure your granddaughter will want to meet you and get to know you, even if it is a little further down the road.
    Without knowing more I can say the same might be true with your daughter. It took me until I was twenty-something before I reconnected with a parent... Give them (and yourself) the opportunity to find their way to you.

  6. #6
    Pincher of Harmonics Blackbird's Avatar
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    Hey dude, resist those evil urges.
    Pick up your PRS and play. Let those feelings write some killer songs for you.
    Follow those links that NomadMike posted.
    Be strong, embrace hope.
    12 408 - 12 DGT - 09 Tremonti II - 98 CU24 - 97 CE22 - Mesa MarkIV - Kemper Profiler Amp - EVH 5150 III - PRS Archon

  7. #7
    Senior Member Daniel's Avatar
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    Please talk to someone and get help. No one needs to know about it, it can be confidential. Two of my brothers died under bad circumstances when their kids were teenagers and it fucked them up, even with the rest of our family here to support them.

    Try to remember, kids get busy with stuff that may seem trivial to us but is the world to them. If you think back on it, you were probably worried about everything else but your parents at that age. It doesn't mean you didn't care or love them, you were a teenager and teenagers are screwy in the head. They take it for granted that their parents will always be there. Add in the fact that she is very young and has a very young child of her own and her problems multiply. She may not communicate it to you but I'm positive she needs you now more than ever. Talking is a two-way deal.

    I have a daughter the same age as yours and as far as I can tell, she doesn't have a care in the world yet she rarely has much to say to me. It broke my heart when she stopped being "Daddy's girl" because I couldn't figure out what I'd done wrong. Turns out, I did nothing wrong. My Mom pointed out I acted the same way when I was 15-22 years old. I didn't have the time of day for my Mom. Too busy with my own selfish nonsense. It was a phase, all kids go through it. We need to be there for them when they need us, and they DO need us, even if they don't say it. That one time when you answer the phone at 2am might change her life one day even though it may have been a year since you last heard from her. It'll mean everything to you as well. Your grandchild will need your love, advice and support as well.

    Keep your chin up, talk to some people, get some help and support. You're a Dad!
    Last edited by Daniel; 06-30-2014 at 05:38 PM.

  8. #8
    Senior Member gush's Avatar
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    Prs2studio, My wife and I have been through a lot with our older kids. They all 3 took a path we didn't lead them to. One thing we learned is that you can not force people to do something they don't want to do. Continue to be a positive force in your daughters life and try to be involved as much as you can. Please seek help to get through this, please.

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    Greetings..

    PLEASE...I beg you..talk to friends, a pastor, someone in whom you can share your pain. I lost an uncle to suicide, and nearly lost my father to suicide. The toll it will take on your family, including your daughter will be profound. May I suggest you pray? Ask God through his Son Jesus Christ to help you in this time.

  10. #10
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    I do have a dr that I see once a week and am on meds for it all. I have my days where it bothers me more and there is more to it all. I am trying and have attempted before. I am safe just venting. Thanks for the kind words my friends

  11. #11
    Angry Southern Gentleman Hopeful Sinner's Avatar
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    For real man, if you ever need a non-judgemental ear to bend about anything at all, please PM me and let's trade contact info.

    I implore you not to use a permanent solution on a temporary problem.

    We are all brothers here...

  12. #12
    Senior Member wardog's Avatar
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    I have to say I appreciate that you have come to us for help. It speaks volumes to the character of the folks on this forum. That being said, READ THE ABOVE POST AGAIN!!!!!! Not knowing your total situation with your daughter, it is hard to comment fully. I can only offer the obvious-- from my point of view. Call her, be real about your feeling to her and what you want to happen between the both of you. LISTEN TO WHAT SHE SAYS, TAKE IT FOR WHAT IT IS. Work to see what she and you want to do to change things together.

    BE PATIENT----- OH AND BE PATIENT
    I like surprises!!!

  13. #13
    Member Johnnyboy94's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoninDuluth View Post
    Greetings..

    PLEASE...I beg you..talk to friends, a pastor, someone in whom you can share your pain. I lost an uncle to suicide, and nearly lost my father to suicide. The toll it will take on your family, including your daughter will be profound. May I suggest you pray? Ask God through his Son Jesus Christ to help you in this time.
    Amen

    OP, what you are considering, Its not worth it. the things you will do to the people you love, they will be torn apart in ways you cannot imagine. It's just not worth it. please follow those links and get help. Dont do this to people you love.
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  14. #14
    Junior Member MikeD's Avatar
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    Keep in mind that even though you don't currently talk to your daughter, your suicide would have a profoundly negative effect on her. Suicide is devastating to everyone involved.
    If you have mental illnesses then you likely have a doctor that you see for treatment, call him. He can help.

  15. #15
    Just a member JustRob's Avatar
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    Lost a family friend to brain cancer today. He went on a cruise with us a little over a month ago and lived every opportunity he had.

    Don't just give up on your opportunities.

  16. #16
    Narrowfield Pickup Fan HANGAR18's Avatar
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    At least you have both a daughter and a grand daughter. Two things I will never have in this life. A lot to be thankful for.

    Buy yourself a Harley-Davidson motorcycle and a PRS guitar and use each abundantly. Works for me and I feel great!
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  17. #17
    Senior Member AP515's Avatar
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    I have a childhood to college family friend who drove his car (and 5 year old autistic son) off a cliff. I traveled across a contintent to attend the funerals. 300 people attended with me. Any one of us would have given much to prevent the tragedy. Many of us did. We talked with him, we cried with him, we paid for things he needed. In the end, it was his choice. But he affected more people than his immediate family. There are 300 people who wish they still had his humor and intellegence in their lives. Life ain't easy. I'm not hear to tell you it's all roses and sunshine. But you influence more people than you think. Here's a thought for you and for my friend Conrad.

    THE RACE

    By D.H.Groberg

    "Quit! Give up! You're beaten!" They shout at me and plead.
    There's just too much against you now. This time you can't succeed!"
    And as I start to hang my head In front of failure's face,
    my downward fall is broken by the memory of a race.
    And hope refills my weakened will as I recall that scene;
    For just the thought of that short race rejuvenates my being.

    A children's race-young boys, young men, how I remember well.
    Excitement, sure! But also fear; it wasn't hard to tell.
    They all lined up so full of hope; each thought to win that race.
    Or tie for first, or if not that, at least take second place.
    And fathers watched from off the side, each cheering for his son.
    And each boy hoped to show his dad that he would be the one.

    The whistle blew and off they went! Young hearts and hopes afire.
    To win and be the hero there was each young boy's desire.
    And one boy in particular, whose dad was in the crowd,
    was running near the lead and thought, "My dad will be so proud!"
    But as they speeded down the field across a shallow dip,
    the little boy who thought to win, lost his step and slipped.
    Trying hard to catch himself His hands flew out to brace,
    And mid the laughter of the crowd He fell flat on his face.
    So down he fell and with him hope, he couldn't win it now.
    Embarrassed, sad, he only wished to disappear somehow.
    But as he fell his dad stood up and showed his anxious face,
    which to the boy so clearly said: "Get up and win the race."

    He quickly rose, no damage done. Behind a bit, that's all –
    and ran with all his mind and might to make up for his fall.
    So anxious to restore himself, to catch up and to win -
    His mind went faster than his legs; He slipped and fell again!
    He wished then he had quit before, with only one disgrace.
    "I'm hopeless as a runner now; I shouldn't try to race."
    But in the laughing crowd he searched and found his father's face.
    That steady look which said again: "Get up and win the race!"
    So up he jumped to try again ten yards behind the last –
    "If I'm to gain those yards," he thought, "I've got to move real fast."
    Exerting everything he had he gained eight or ten.
    But trying so hard to catch the lead He slipped and fell again!
    Defeat! He lay there silently, a tear dropped from his eye
    “There's no sense running any more; Three strikes: I'm out! Why try?”

    The will to rise had disappeared, all hope had fled away;
    so far behind, so error prone; a loser all the way.
    "I've lost, so what's the use," he thought. "I'll live with my disgrace."
    But then he thought about his dad who soon he'd have to face.
    "Get up," an echo sounded low. "Get up and take your place;
    you were not meant for failure here. Get up and win the race."
    "With borrowed will, get up," it said, "You haven't lost at all,
    for winning is no more than this: To rise each time you fall."

    So up he rose to run once more, and with a new commit he resolved
    that win or lose, at least he wouldn't quit.
    So far behind the others now, The most he'd ever been.
    Still he gave it all he had and ran as though to win.
    Three times he'd fallen, stumbling;
    Three times he rose again; too far behind to hope to win
    He still ran to the end.

    They cheered the winning runner as he crossed the line first place,
    head high, and proud, and happy; No falling, no disgrace.
    But when the fallen youngster crossed the line last place,
    the crowd gave him the greater cheer for finishing the race.
    And even though he came in last with head bowed low, unproud,
    you would have thought he'd won the Race to listen to the crowd.
    And to his dad he sadly said, "I didn't do so well."
    'To me, you won," his father said. "You rose each time you fell."

    And now when things seem dark and hard and difficult to face,
    the memory of that little boy helps me in my own race.
    For all of life is like that race, with ups and downs and all.
    And all you have to do to win, Is rise each time you fall.
    "Quit! Give up! You're beaten!" They still shout in my face.
    But another voice within me says: "GET UP AND WIN THE RACE!"
    1988 CE24, 1995 CE22, 2000 SC, 2003 Standard 22, 2003 Cu24 AP, 2006 Cu24 AP, 2006 SC AP, 2007 CuRo22, 2010 Starla Stoptail, 2010 Mira
    2007 SE Soapy 2, 2010 SE 25th Anni Cu24, 2012 SE Bernie, 2013 SE Angelus Custom

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  18. #18
    Junior Member tyt921's Avatar
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    I am sure we all been to those dark places in life where it almost always forces us into a choice we think we dont have. But the fact is we do have that choice. You need to be able to emotional ventilate and have a social outlet. Do you have friends who you see often? Do you have good friends who you seldom see and can give them a call? Do that. You will feel much better afterwards. If this forum gives you a sense of belonging and serves as an outlet for you, come more often and post.

    If your life feels empty, structure your daily routine and give yourself things to do or goals to accomplish. Try new things to give your mind new sensory information to process. You need to stimulate your mind with new things. What tends to happen in life is when you are down. Things tend to happen, random things, bad things, and sometimes good things, but when we are depressed, we ONLY see the negative things, because deep down thats all we want: to believe that there is no solution, continue to be depressed. Then from being depressed, you will see a series of bad events thats happening ONLY to you and you will correlate this to your mind, convincing that its over, you are in a mess, god hates you etc. But in reality what you need to do is start thinking positively and live in the NOW to prevent all of that.

    When I was in college, I had a dark dark stage in my life where I wished I was dead. I used to cross the streets hoping some car would just end my misery. But I took action, and told myself that I will be happy and ok. Friends guided me, and forced me to try new foods, go to new places, dress properly. They forced to go to church. I myself is not a church believer, but that moment, i put my trust in his hands. I needed his care and his children to care for me, and thats what I got. I met new people. They called me out, treated me to lunch and dinner. Had great conversations. Gave me hope. Shortly I was able to get on my feet and be on my way again.

    Go, lift yourself up. High up and do something. Good luck!
    AMP: Blackstar ID:15 TVP
    Guitar: PRS SE Custom 24

  19. #19
    Senior Member Michael B's Avatar
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    Get help man and be patient....children grow up and figure out they were a douche'. Suicide= A permanent solution to a Temporary problem. Go enjoy life and be happy and good things will start to happen!
    2010 Black cherry 10 Top Tremonti-signed by Tremonti Modded by PTC DGT frets/signed by PRS
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  20. #20
    Member Texas_minor_blues's Avatar
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    One thing I want to say to you is that you must remember you give your child the 1 thing no other man can, you are her father AND a grandfather. She may not talk to you now but she will come around as long as you always let her know that door is open.
    Also remember that you have survived everything that has been thrown at you these 38 years and you have survived it all. As stated before pick up your guitar and let your music be your savior

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